Your Body Is Not The Problem (The Instructions Were Just Missing)

A Love Letter to the Girls Who Have Tried

Everything...

Hi.

If you’re reading this at night, a little tired, maybe a little bloated, maybe

wondering why your body feels like it’s always one step behind you

— this is for you. I used to think something was wrong with me. Not in a

dramatic “I’m broken” way. More like a quiet, annoying hum that never shut

off. The kind that shows up when you’re exhausted even though you slept.

When your jeans feel tighter after eating “perfectly.” When your mood flips

for no reason and you’re like… cool, love that.

I thought my body was difficult. High-maintenance. A project I just wasn’t

managing very well.

I really believed that if I could just try harder — wake up earlier, eat cleaner,

be more disciplined, want it more — I’d finally become one of those girls.

You know the ones. Glowy. Effortless. Perfect skin. Eats a salad and somehow

feels amazing afterward.

But here’s the thing no one says out loud:

We aren’t failing.

We’re just doing this without instructions.

And we’ve been blaming ourselves for it.

The “Try Harder” Era

For as long as I can remember, the advice has been the same.

Move more. Eat less. Push through it. Don’t be dramatic.

And when it doesn’t work, the assumption is always that you messed up.

You weren’t consistent. You cheated. You didn’t want it badly enough.

But bodies don’t respond to punishment. They respond to feeling safe.

Your hormones don’t care how disciplined you are. Your nervous system

doesn’t respond to guilt. And your metabolism is not impressed by how

little you ate today. If your body feels “off,” it’s probably not because you’re

doing nothing. It’s usually because you’re doing too much of the wrong thing.

Your Body Isn’t Being Difficult — It’s Talking

We were taught to treat our bodies like fixer-upper houses. Constantly

tweaking, correcting, renovating. But your body isn’t a before-and-after photo.

It’s a living system. It changes with stress. With sleep. With emotions. With

how safe you feel in your own life. So when your energy dips, digestion

gets weird, or weight feels stuck — that’s not your body being dramatic.

That’s communication.

Fatigue is your body saying, “Hey… I’m tired.”

Cravings are your body saying, “I need something steady.”

Bloating is your body saying, “That didn’t land great.”

These aren’t failures. They’re messages.

Why Wellness Stuff Just… Doesn’t Work

Here’s what most advice forgets to mention:

Women’s hormones change all the time: Stress hits our bodies fast, Under

eating is basically praised. Rest is treated like a luxury. So when a

one-size-fits-all plan doesn’t work, women assume they’re the problem.

But your body was never meant to thrive on restriction, chaos, or

constantly monitoring yourself like a science experiment. You weren’t

supposed to feel this confused.

The Stuff That Actually Helps (No Weird Rules)

This is where things get way simpler than the internet makes them.

1. Eat Like Your Body Needs You to Survive

Skipping meals, living on caffeine, or eating “light” all day puts your

body in low-key panic mode.

A calmer place to start:

• Eat protein in the morning

• Don’t eat carbs alone

• Don’t wait until you’re starving

This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being consistent.

2. Your Nervous System Is Running the Show

If your life feels rushed, loud, or stressful, your body feels it too.

A stressed body holds on: To weight. To tension. To exhaustion.

Support looks like:

• Warm food

• Gentle movement

• Slower mornings when you can

• Rest without feeling guilty about it

You don’t heal by pushing harder. You heal by softening.

3. Consistency > Perfection

Your body loves routines.

Not extremes. Not resets. Not starting over every Monday.

Regular meals. Regular sleep. Daily sunlight.

Boring? Maybe.

Effective? Very.

What “Listening” Actually Means

Listening to your body doesn’t mean obsessing over every symptom.

It just means checking in.

Instead of asking,“What’s wrong with me?”

Try asking,“What do I need right now?”

Sometimes it’s food. Sometimes it’s rest. Sometimes it’s saying no.

All of those count.

The Part Where Everything Feels Lighter

The most healing thing for a lot of women isn’t a supplement or a plan.

It’s realizing they were never broken.

Your body has been trying to help you this whole time. You just weren’t

taught how to listen. And once you start to get it, everything shifts.

Food stops feeling scary. Your body stops feeling like an enemy. Health

stops feeling like a full-time job. You don’t need a new body.

You just needed better instructions — and a little more kindness.

If this felt like something you needed to hear, I’m really glad you’re here

Love, Abby